Christian Polygyny – A House "partly" Divided

 



Although some Christian groups continue the ancient practice of polygyny, most Christian traditions reject this biblical form of marriage in favor of the prevalent one-man and one-woman type of monogamy.

This post examines the polygamous form of marriage known as polygyny—a relationship in which one man has more than one wife. What’s in this post?

Ø  Reasons most Christians reject polygyny

Ø  Reasons some Christians approve polygyny

Ø  Psychological factors associated with polygynous relationships

Christians generally reference the Bible when creating doctrinal statements that proclaim the way Christians ought to live. It’s commonly known that ancient leaders like Abraham and King David had more than one wife. Polygyny was common throughout the centuries of Israel’s history found in the Hebrew Bible. In fact, the leaders of the 12 tribes of ancient Israel had different mothers. What many Christians may not know is that polygyny continued to be a part of Jewish culture during the time Jesus and his disciples lived in the first century and continued until the 10th century (see Jewish Virtual Library) when many, but not all, Jews accepted a ban on polygamy.

Jesus and his early followers were of course Jews living under Jewish law as well as Roman law. Although the church of Rome provided guidance for most of the world’s Christians and prohibited polygamy, other Christians continued the practice and do so until this day. Outside of Christianity, polygyny is practiced by Muslims. Although polygyny is rare in most countries, its existence has allowed scientists to understand contemporary versions of polygyny, which may offer insights into the greater complexity of relationships than is evident in monogamous marriages.

Reasons most Christians reject polygyny

The primary reason most Christians reject polygyny relies on a pervasive interpretation of biblical texts that rely on statements about monogamy beginning with Adam and Eve (for example, see Focus on the Family) as well as the relationship problems reported in the households of prominent biblical men who had many wives. Following are a few salient points.

1. In the Genesis creation story, God created Eve from Adam’s rib and gifts her to Adam to be his helper. God blesses them. More importantly for Christians is Jesus’ teaching on divorce that references the first couple, which God joined together and made them as one (See Matthew 19: 1-12).

2. A second teaching comes from the apostle Paul regarding church leadership. In his first letter to Timothy, Paul advises that church leaders should be the husband of one wife (3:2). This text has been interpreted to mean that church leaders could only have had one wife. Those who were divorced and remarried would not meet this standard. But the verse has also been applied to mean a leader cannot have more than one wife at the same time.

3. Christian writers also point to the difficulties in the household of men who had multiple wives such as Abraham, Israel, Samson, David, and Solomon. For a summary of Christian views, see Klein, (2023, April 2).

Reasons some Christians approve polygyny

Some Christian groups continue to support polygyny as an acceptable form of marriage (e.g., Agadjanian, 2020; Baloyi, 2012). In Africa, various churches that include members who live in polygynous relationships are those identified as AICs (African Initiated Churches), which are those churches created in Africa by Africans (Masoga & Shokane, 2016).

A few biblical arguments support Christian polygyny as a moral form of marriage.

1. First, the great leaders of ancient Israel, blessed by God, had more than one wife. These included such men as Abraham, Israel, Gideon, and David.

2. There is no overt commandment prohibiting God’s people from living in polygynous relationships. There are many commandments in the Bible. None of those commandments condemn polygyny. If polygyny were a sin, given the detailed commandments, surely polygyny would be in the list.

3. One commandment dictates how a man with two wives must treat his firstborn son even when the firstborn is not from his relationship with the wife he loves (See Deuteronomy 21: 15-17).

4. Deuteronomy 25: 5-10 instructs a man to marry his brother’s widow if she had not given birth to a son. This command is presented as a duty to preserve his brother’s legacy and there are negative social consequences for failing to carry out this responsibility.

Psychological factors in polygynous relationships

I present these findings with a note of caution about generalizing these findings to other cultures in the present and in the past. The findings may only serve to think about polygynous relationships rather than assume what is true in a particular contemporary study is true for all people in past or present polygynous relationships.

Researchers have documented that women in polygynous relationships suffer higher rates of physical abuse than do women in monogamous relationships (e.g., Hassouneh-Phillips, 2001).

Women in polygynous marriages report high rates of emotional distress, which includes depression, anxiety, and other conditions (e.g., Alhuzail, 2023; Shepard, 2013). Although there appears to be a consensus that polygynous relationships are harmful, Lawson and others (2015) challenge that view.

Some wives in polygynous relationships comment on the benefits, which include sharing household responsibilities and caring for children (e.g., Tabi et al., 2010).

Women who do not bear children appear to have been stigmatized in the Bible and continue to experience pressure to have children in modern cultures. For example, in their sample of Gambian women, Dierickx et al. (2018) found that women who were childless experienced social stigma along with financial problems and violence. The women also reported stress and sadness.

In their small study of wives in polygynous relationships in Ghana, Tabi et al. (2010) reported the primary reason wives allowed the addition of another wife was infertility, which of course reminds us of the biblical stories like Abram and Sarai (Abraham and Sarah). The problem of Sarai’s infertility was temporarily resolved when she allowed her husband to take her servant Hagar as a second wife who then became pregnant and gave birth to a son (Ishmael). Of course, readers will note that problems ensued when Sarah gave birth to Isaac.

 

Concluding Remarks

One point that is missing in discussions about biblical and Christian polygyny is respect for people who consent to marital relationships that make sense for them within their cultural context. The fact that people, mostly women, in many types of marriage are abused emotionally, economically, physically, and sexually is not a reason to condemn either monogamy or polygamy. It seems that all Christians ought to be concerned about fostering healthy marriages and caring for the adults in unhealthy marriages, including children within any abusive family.

The arguments Christians use to support a ban on polygamy are easy to understand. Most people do not question the ways their church leaders interpret the Bible, especially when they believe that the Bible is God’s Word. No one wants to challenge God; however, in the case of polygamy, Christians opposing polygyny create arguments based on reasoning to deal with the scriptures that governed Old Testament polygyny.

It is harder to understand why progressive Christians would not support polygamy when they support other forms of marriage not considered in the Bible. That is, progressive Christians do not rely on a literal understanding of the scriptures when it comes to supporting the following:

1. Ordaining clergy who have been divorced and remarried

2. Ordaining clergy who have same-sex spouses

3. Affirming same-sex marriage

There is one caveat here. Progressive Christians and non-Christians may reasonably be concerned for women who are trapped by their cultures in harmful nonconsensual polygynous relationships. However, the fact that not all women in polygynous relationships experience harm reduces the force of this argument and suggests that freedom to consent to a relationship and cultural support for leaving all abusive relationships may be more important than banning polygyny per se.

How do Christians find ways to create exemptions to biblical teachings?

Human are creative when it comes to finding wiggle-room when it comes to laws and policies. There are likely many reasons I have not considered, but here are a few.

1. Cultural arguments. Christians argue that some biblical teachings are for people who lived in ancient cultures and therefore do not apply to day. Thus, most Christians ignore respect for the Jewish Sabbath Day and do what they want on Sunday. Most Christians eat whatever they can afford without worrying about God’s commands to Israel, which prohibited eating certain foods. Most Christians do not support stoning as a form of punishment as found in the Bible.

2. Context arguments. Context arguments can be similar to cultural arguments but they emphasize a specific situation. For example, some women argue that Paul’s advice to Timothy that women should be silent in church or should be under a man’s authority only applies to a specific church and not to other churches of his day and certainly not to churches today.

3. Linguistic arguments. Essentially, arguments based on biblical language rely on disagreements about the meaning of ancient words and phrases. Scholars disagree on how to translate specific words and expressions. Most of us do not have the technical expertise to discern which translation is best. In addition, some doctrines are based on a literal meaning of a translated phrase and ignore the possibility of metaphorical or allegorical interpretations. So many different Christian groups exist because they disagree on specific doctrines.

4. Scientific arguments. More and more Christians have learned to accept scientific evidence as a basis for rejecting a literal interpretation of some biblical texts in favor of considering alternative explanations (e.g., Sutton, 2024). For example, although Christians generally view God as the creator, they believe evolution is the process by which people were created. The early Genesis stories about Adam and Eve were about the identity of the Israelites and not about literal people. This has the advantage of not wondering where the wives of Adam and Eve’s children come from.

Another example is the relatively recent discovery that babies developed from the fertilization of a woman’s egg and that some reasons for a couple’s infertility lie with the man and not the woman. There is no biological or moral reason to condemn women for not bearing a son nor is the absence of a son a viable reason to justify adding a wife or other woman to a household.

Psychosocial studies of women in polygynous marriages have documented problems of abuse and impaired mental health at higher rates than for women in monogamous relationships (e.g., Shepherd, 2013) but such problems may not be universal for all women in polygynous marriages (e.g., Lawson, et al., 2015). An important factor regarding marital satisfaction is the relationship between or among the wives in polygynous marriages (e.g., Anderson, 2000). Research by Gwanfogbe et al. (1997) identified several factors related to marital and life satisfaction (1997).

5. Rights Arguments.

It is not surprising that people concerned about women’s rights would be quick to condemn polygyny—both the biblical variety and polygyny as practiced today. In patriarchal societies, women had, and still have, few rights. In the Bible, a marriage was arranged with a woman’s father. One of her prominent roles in the Bible and throughout Christian history was to produce a son as a male heir. Biblical examples illustrate how men obtained children by sex with other wives or household servants. And many of us are familiar with the founder of the Church of England and his treatment of the women who did not produce a son. As a psychologist, it is easy to be concerned about the harm done to women in polygynous relationships. In addition, the research on the wellbeing of children in polygynous households (e.g., Al-Sharfi et al., 2016) is a reason to be concerned about these forms of marriage.

References

Agadjanian V. (2020). Condemned and Condoned: Polygynous Marriage in Christian Africa. Journal of marriage and the family82(2), 751–768. https://doi.org/10.1111/jomf.12624

Alhuzail, N. A. (2023). “I wish he were dead” The experience of loss among young Arab-Bedouin women in polygamous families. Affilia: Feminist Inquiry in Social Work38(1), 75–90. https://doi.org/10.1177/08861099221075899

Anderson, C. M. (2000). The persistence of polygyny as an adaptive response to poverty and oppression in apartheid South Africa. Cross-Cultural Research: The Journal of Comparative Social Science34(2), 99–112. https://doi.org/10.1177/106939710003400201

Dierickx, S., Rahbari, L., Longman, C., Jaiteh, F., & Coene, G. (2018). 'I am always crying on the inside': a qualitative study on the implications of infertility on women's lives in urban Gambia. Reproductive health15(1), 151. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12978-018-0596-2

Gwanfogbe, P. N., Schumm, W. R., Smith, M., & Furrow, J. L. (1997). Polygyny and Marital Life Satisfaction: an Exploratory Study from Rural Cameroon. Journal of Comparative Family Studies, 28, 55-71.

Hassouneh-Phillips, D. (2001). Polygamy and wife abuse: A qualitative study of Muslim women in America. Health Care for Women International22(8), 735–748. https://doi.org/10.1080/073993301753339951

Lawson, D. W., James, S., Ngadaya, E., Ngowi, B., Mfinanga, S. G. M., & Mulder, M. B. (2015). No evidence that polygynous marriage is a harmful cultural practice in northern Tanzania. PNAS Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America112(45), 13827–13832. https://doi.org/10.1073/pnas.1507151112

Masoga, M. A., & Shokane, A. L. (2016). Women in polygynous marriages and African Initiated Churches: Selected narratives in Greater Tzaneen, South Africa. Agenda30(3), 80–90. https://doi.org/10.1080/10130950.2016.1259868

Shepard, L. D. (2013). The impact of polygamy on women’s mental health: A systematic review. Epidemiology and Psychiatric Sciences22(1), 47–62. https://doi.org/10.1017/S2045796012000121

Sutton, G. W. (2024). Irreconcilable differences? Apes, Adam and an ark: Relating Christianity and psychology. Springfield, MO: Sunflower ISBN = 979-8323386581 (ON AMAZON)

Tabi, M. M., Doster, C., & Cheney, T. (2010). A qualitative study of women in polygynous marriages. International nursing review57(1), 121–127. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1466-7657.2009.00762.x

Notes

The earliest biblical reference to polygyny is in Genesis 4, which refers to the two wives of Lamech.

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Polygamy, polygyny, polyandry

 

I-position in polygyny

 


Geoffrey W. Sutton, PhD is Emeritus Professor of Psychology. He retired from a clinical practice and was credentialed in clinical neuropsychology and psychopharmacology. His website is  www.suttong.com

 

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